ACTIVE LISTENING

Why do I concentrate on me at every point? Every time I would start to open my mouth I would always focus on "ME"... I think I'm Smart, I'm friendly, I'm attractive and most of all I'm so SELF CENTERED. I re-read all I've written here and some that I haven't posted...just to check how many times I've written "I" in comparison to "You"...I've also noticed that whenever I'm talking to someone, I would not find the patience not to BUTT IN at anytime I would wanted... I asked myself,  Why do I do this? What would it make me? (see it's still all about me?) OK so there are some people who cannot listen to others and can easily turn the topic of any conversation onto themselves...I guess they are called "Bores". Am I one?

I never liked someone who don't know how to listen...seriously it is one of my requirement to any new ones I would meet. I guess It's my primary "Requisite" or a DEMAND. I want someone who's a GOOD LISTENER. They would always WIN my attention, again the self centered "ME" reappears. hahaha.

Let's talk about "ACTIVE LISTENING"... Everyone who had a few COLLEGE CLASSES talking about active listening, or had SOFT SKILLS TRAINING for call center jobs, please raise your hand now! WHAT IS ACTIVE LISTENING? According to Thomas Gordon (Widely recognized as a pioneer in teaching communication skills), "Active listening involves carefully attending to and demonstrating understanding of what another person says". And according to GOOGLE WEB DEFINITION..."Active listening is a way of listening that focuses entirely on what the other person is saying and confirms understanding of both the content of the message and the emotions and feelings underlying the message to ensure that understanding is accurate." WOW!


But... Do you really listen to those around you? Would you say you actually know how to listen? Your family, friends, classmates, teachers, co-workers, clients, lover, boss, sales lady...would you say you really can listen to them? Generally a lot of us know how to, but most of the time we would relinquish any information or knowledge, like the way we tune out any TV or Radio advertisement or people we're not really interested in or things that bother us. Sometimes we neglect the benefits of opening our ears and most importantly our mind to those around us by LISTENING. Often we only end up hearing what we want to hear instead of what was actually said. Listening is paying attention, processing and remembering all that is being conveyed verbally and sometimes non-verbally.

Listening is not different from investing for a business...there's always a profit on it. In order to get what the other person is trying to say...First, you have to be in SILENCE. The power of Silence is Great. You GET MORE by keeping quiet. The basic idea is that, as you listen to someone, you pay special attention to comprehending what this person says... So YOU LEARN MORE. This applies to everything... like business, school, work, social gathering or even a romantic relationship. Listening to someone with a complete focus really taught me well, and the best thing about it is I AM HAPPY. I've realized you can learn more with your ears than anything else. Some people has the GIFT OF GAB but if you are not willing to listen you are nothing. Listening is everything.

Active Listening can be a powerful tool...it can develop a positive feeling, admiration and respect. On the other hand it can also produce damaging emotions. But you can always prevent it if you know HOW TO LISTEN. But keep in mind that being the LISTENER wouldn't give you that excuse to just sit back and do nothing. How you listen is also as important as How you speak, doing so, you're giving the speaker the assurance of being appreciated and understood. And you do owe them the courtesy of listening.

Being on a romantic conversation...I believe that THERE IS NO ISSUE TOO SMALL TO SHARE. Romance needs COMMUNICATION..... which needs better understanding and the biggest part of good communication is LISTENING, and it's very helpful in connecting with people. And by active listening you are giving someone some sort of a gift, and it's one of the greatest. Also take note that Active listening is very different from the way we usually deal with arguments... It is very difficult to carry out this change especially when both of you are upset, but Don't get discouraged if it doesn't work right away. Just Keep Trying... 

                       

                              SO ARE YOU LISTENING??? :p